For it is not possible that the son of these tears should perish.

Last night was my St. Augustine reading group. I have always felt that this passage from The Confessions is particularly moving:

Thou gavest her meantime another answer, which I call to mind; for much I pass by, hasting to those things which more press me to confess unto Thee, and much I do not remember. Thou gavest her then another answer, by a Priest of Thine, a certain Bishop brought up in Thy Church, and well studied in Thy books. Whom when this woman had entreated to vouchsafe to converse with me, refute my errors, unteach me ill things, and teach me good things (for this he was wont to do, when he found persons fitted to receive it), he refused, wisely, as I afterwards perceived. For he answered, that I was yet unteachable,
being puffed up with the novelty of that heresy, and had already perplexed divers unskilful persons with captious questions, as she had told him: "but let him alone a while" (saith he), "only pray God for him,
he will of himself by reading find what that error is, and how great its impiety." At the same time he told her, how himself, when a little one, had by his seduced mother been consigned over to the Manichees,
and had not only read, but frequently copied out almost all, their books, and had (without any argument or proof from any one) seen how much that sect was to be avoided; and had avoided it. Which when he had said, and she would not be satisfied, but urged him more, with entreaties and many tears, that he would see me and discourse with me; he, a little displeased at her importunity, saith, "Go thy ways and God bless thee, for it is not possible that the son of these tears should perish." Which answer she took (as she often mentioned in her conversations with me) as if it had sounded from heaven.

Beyond the profound poetry of this passage, there are so many deep insights packed into this account. First, and as I realized for the first time last night, St. Augustine wasn't the only one who cycled through a Manichean phase in a journey to orthodoxy. The unnamed Bishop who refused to tackle the "puffed up" Augustine had been raised a Manichean, which indoctrination apparently did not take. This gave him the confidence to recommend that Augustine be allowed to fully investigate the Manichean heresy, which given Augustine's raw intelligence the Bishop realized would result in Augustine realizing that Manichianism was an intellectual and spiritual vacuum.

Further, there is a timeless quality to the Bishop's sage advice to Monica. Yesterday at Rotary several Rotarians were talking about how there twenty-something children were no longer attending church. Both concluded that there was no remedy for this flirtation with apostasy except time and faith. Which, when you think about it, is not far off from what the unnamed Bishop told Monica.

Finally, the Bishop's advice seems so counter-intuitive and yet is so right. For most of us, our natural tendency [particularly here on the web] is to argue, cite text, parse logic, and all that does is to confirm people in their ideas. Forcing a person to defend a proposition, no matter how dubious, frequently cements the person to the position and makes it emotionally impossible for him to abandon it. Growth, maturation and perspective coupled with patience and contact though may be the proper remedy. Nonetheless, it probably is tough advice to follow when your kid shaves his head and joins a cult.