Sometimes life is an episode from Seinfeld...

...like the blind-date I was set up on with a woman who spoke no English. (The only way that one could have been any more ironic is if she had actually been blind - "oh, you meant a 'blind' date.")

Or a lady friend of mine whose first date involved taking the guy to a baseball game, where he disappeared when she went to get beer. (And you know who you are.)

The Frisky provides a list of "first date confessions" which, presumably, were "deal-breakers."  The list includes:

That he was a heroin addict and had spent three months on Rikers Island detoxing.


That he was a MURDERER. As in, he had killed someone with a broken wine bottle when he was 16.

That his last girlfriend was 16. He was 32.

That he was under federal investigation for insider trading.

That he was polyamorous. (He told me this in the first 30 seconds of date).

That he was unable to achieve orgasm and he and his last girlfriend saw a sex therapist.

That he had been stalking me online for over a year.

That he was a communist and writing a manifesto on drugs.

That he was married (!) but probably getting a divorce, didn’t have a job (although pretended he did because he was an “artist”—meaning he made just about the scariest theater masks you have ever seen in your life), and lived with his parents.

That he was a sex addict in an open relationship.

That he was a 9/11 conspiracy theorist who thought Bush/Cheney/Rove were behind the terrorist attacks.

You have to wonder why any guy would think that these things would help them "seal the deal," particularly the one about stalking the girl for a year.  Or the one in the comments where the guy confesses a predeliction for "necrophilia."