Saturday, December 28, 2013

This guy - a law school graduate who couldn't find a law job and is selling cologne - says he doesn't feel "entitled."

To me, at least, he sounds entitled.  Clearly, working retail sucks, but news flash all work sucks. Or at least there are parts of all jobs that suck.  If a person doesn't like laughing at not funny jokes of customers, would they like laughing at not funny jokes of senior partners?  Certainly the pay would be better, but at that point we are just negotiating over price.

//3. Being forced to react to customer’s stupid fucking jokes. I’ve worked retail before so I’m used to the cliche shit like ‘oh this item didn’t scan, it must be free right?? hurr durr durr” but the old bags that inhabit this store are especially grating with this. The other day this woman walked by pushing a stroller and asked me how to get out of the store. I gave her the directions and as she was walking away she quipped “It’s like a Vegas casino in here!” I smiled politely. But that wasn’t good enough for her. She looked back and repeated it as if I hadn’t heard: “Like a Vegas casino in here!”. I dug deep deep down and summoned all the fucks I could give and managed a forced little chuckle. She actually fucking stopped in her tracks. Turned around. “You know, like one of those Vegas casinos?” Jesus fucking Christ you stupid cow, I get it. Built like a maze, no windows, no clocks.. I fucking get it. Next time I’ll just drop down and eat your wiry gray muff in appreciation of your sterling wit.

4. Coworkers marveling over jobs I am technically overqualified for. The other day some handsome foppish dude in his early 20s came in and bought a decently expensive cologne. After he left the vendor who had helped him was talking to some people and telling them “he works in a law firm, he’s one of those um um what do you call it…” Paralegal I chimed in “Yeah, paralegal! He’s a paralegal at a law firm.” The phrase law firm for some reason emphasized like the guy worked for the president.

5. Ridiculous questions related to my law degree. Everybody keeps asking me
questions about how to get out of petty traffic tickets. I try to explain to people that I didn’t learn anything that practical in law school. I think people don’t even believe that I went to law school because they seem to have the impression that you learn every law in existence there and they are flabbergasted that I don’t know a magic shortcut to get their speeding tickets thrown out.

6. REALLY ridiculous questions related to my law degree. One guy asked me the other day – does having a law degree make you feel empowered.

7. The fear that I’ll see someone I know. Luckily I’m not from here so I don’t have to worry about high school classmates or anything but I’m deathly afraid a law school classmate will see me. I saw a guy I knew from law school yesterday who works in biglaw now but I ducked behind a counter before he saw me. I think every day about what it would be like if one of the partners at my 2l summer firm saw me. It would be humiliating but at the same time I kind of hope the partner who no offered me does see me there. I think he doesn’t realize what kind of economy he discarded me into and I want him to know that he fucked my life up majorly.

1 comment:

Johh Kasaian said...

If he doesn't want his job, may I have it?

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